Hear My Heart
I heard of a tragedy today that instantly broke my heart. I was grieved by it in many ways.
I was immediately reminded of evil in the world, of a world that is hurting.
I was then reminded of the light of the world.
I know that when we see and hear terrible things so many think “There couldn’t be a God…” We resort to an absence of light instead of the presence of darkness.
I was made aware of a husband who ended his life in bed next to his wife, by gunfire. I am grieved by the fact that he was so convinced of his own worthlessness to cause such trauma to his life partner. I am grieved that he hated his life so deeply to not think beyond the decision.
I mentioned being reminded of the light… the light being Jesus. I once felt worthless. I once felt pain so deeply that I didn’t want to exist. At the time the evil, Satan, deceived me to only focus on me. What I wasn’t doing, what I couldn’t be, the pain I felt, the pain I caused others…
This was what my mind was vexed with. Poisoned by the idea that I couldn’t be better, feel better, or that anyone would be better without me.
When that’s the focus, you don’t have much time to think about how your desire to not exist will devastate the ones you love.
If there was no God, I don’t know that I would be here. If I was not transformed by Jesus Christ, I do not know that I would be here.
Not only do I have salvation, but I sought professional help. With Jesus I had hope again and knew I could be well with relief from the pain. I knew that I could overcome mental illness. With therapy, I learned how to combat any issues and to cope with life’s ups and downs.
If you are still reading this, I hope you hear me out. I hope that you realize there is still hope. I pray that you don’t give up. I pray that if you lost someone you don’t give up. The Word of God gives life when we open our hearts to hear from the Holy Spirit. Jesus Christ is the way to salvation.
I hope you reach out to me or those around you if you need prayer or encouragement. You can reach me on Instagram @arikapiggee
Do not be afraid to call this hotline if needed. National Suicide Prevention Hotline
1-800- 273-8255 https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org
